The root meaning of “auto” is self or spontaneous. Yet the automobile is not self-moving, autonomy is not self-will (since we are externally shared and motivated), and automatic always requires intervention.
“Auto” is more of a matter of degree. We hand over control to processes that promise freedom, yet more often cleverly disguise long-distance reliance (oil, software, labor, or ideology), which automates us in trade for a “convenience.”
Tag: identity
- Theme: Self
auto is not
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1–2 minutes - Theme: Self
Eat your pain
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1–2 minutesYou can be a little self-pitying booger all morning, angry and weepy and manic, and finally, realize you don’t need that behavior.
It isn’t beneath you; it is just that you know how this plays out, and it is exhausting and hurtful.
Eat that pain, choke that rumination, and know you are God-damn amazing. How did you ever forget that truth? Eat that darkness and burn bright. - Theme: Growth
Sabotaging others is self-sabotage
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1–2 minutesSelf-sabotage gets attention. Passive-aggressive sabotage is the same thing. You do not let someone’s life go smoothly: you make yourself into a bump or barricade in the road of life.
We then rationalize not helping as "help": they need to learn (i.e., submit to me).
If we decide to help joyfully (rather than manipulate and protect), we can get the attention we crave, but in a positive sense over the long-term instead of the painful short-term tactics that further isolates us. - Theme: Growth
Picking up your toys and leaving
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1–2 minutesIn my family, we were taught that when people will not listen or change with you, you should take your better, wiser self away and play your own game your way. That’ll show em.
While this preserves your integrity, leaving becomes limiting. How do you learn to charm, disarm or dominate if your go-to move is running away?Leaving isn’t a wrong move, but it is a crowbar, and it’s impossible to build a house with only demolition tools.
- Theme: Self
self-made traps
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1–2 minutesEvery problem I have is a self-made trap.
When I work too much, I do not set the boundary: I dangerously conflate my ‘sense of self’ with accomplishment and people-pleasing. All my responsibilities are my earlier wishes coming true.
Unfortunately, my previous dreams overwhelm me, turning into nightmares. I act out, angrily throwing tantrums until I am recognized and soothed like a child. - Theme: Growth
Size matters: the small things are more important
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1–2 minutesWe often dismiss the small decisions as inconsequential because of their slight impact.
We assume our character is reflected in big decisions: to whom you get married or your job. However, these events happen to you because of who you are.
Who you are is aggregated daily through small contacts and seemingly trivial chores. Your approach to the small inevitably becomes large. - Theme: Self
healing revelations
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1–2 minutesEvery problem I have could be self-diagnosed, but until verbalized to another it remains malleable: a hidden truth without consequence.
The accountability of deep friends is the path to becoming whole (seen and not hidden).
They reveal you, which heals you: instead of repression and rumination, you can see clearly, forgive, and try a new way with support. - Theme: Growth
Capitalism’s victory
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1–2 minutesCapitalism allowed all men to be equal rather than blindly despised.
The traditional tribal divisions of race, religion, nationality, and gender were supplanted by individual virtues of ambition, merit, and commerce. Necessarily, destructive tendencies emerge, yet trade made others potentially valuable. Thus consideration replaced prejudice. - Theme: Self
The punch drunk ego
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1–2 minutesYou have to let go.
When we make a mistake or are insulted, we hang onto it, impairing our behavior. Our pride (which can appear as self-loathing or righteousness) causes us to wade into the present moment, swinging for retribution.
Holding onto you tenacious self-harm makes you the victim and converts friends to villains. - Theme: Self
Contrary individuation counterbalances into stagnation
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1–2 minutesOur contrariness is our path to sovereign individuation: “You can’t tell me what to do.”
Soon no one is in charge, and nothing gets done. Social distinctions flatten, and it is hard to see how we compel systems reliant on unity (infrastructure).
As hierarchy collapses into chaos, perhaps we should reconsider our correlation of individual freedom with contrariness.