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It is easy to succumb to justice: dadgummit, we are in the right. However, being "right" prevents you from living fully.
There is definitely a type of vital energy in rage, but it is a narrow range of living: a trap of intensity that drowns joy.
Within this trap, we live in a state of strained repetition: embalmed in injustice.
“He was embalmed no longer in injustice.” Phillip Roth, The Human Stain
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A friend brought up “the lack of accountability” in politics.
In response, I brought up “the path to forgiveness,” suggesting we can hold people responsible, but allow resocialization. Otherwise, there is no reason for the “tyrant or abuser” to submit to rehabilitation and reintegration.
They responded that they would “never forgive Trump.”
In this situation, the impulse for accountability operates as a virtuous term, while smuggling in revenge-justice.
What I fear is a system with no possibility of recuperation; only punishment and a lifetime of alienation. In such a system we create and enforce opposition: once one mistake is made, the only logical thing to do is go further afield and amplify your martyrdom, because you can never return.
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You can realize you’re silly and emotional and ignorant and confused. But this does not mean you are not a good person who is trying.
Instead, recognizing your flaws, owning them, and still attempting to improve is all we can ask of anyone.
The person you should fear is the sure one who "knows."
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You can be an ass. You can realize you’re silly and emotional and ignorant and confused. But this does not mean you are not a good person who is trying.
Recognizing your flaws, owning them, and still attempting to be better is all we can ask of anyone.
The person to fear is the one takes pleasure in their assery or the one who hides it.
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You can say you love yourself and forgive yourself, but there still is a knot of depression or tightness within you.
It can only be relieved of its oppositional threat within yourself by accepting and befriending it: by loving the depression.
To tell your depression you are their friend and will hold their hand is much more potent (realistic) than trying to expel it.
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Why would you ever defend yourself? To explain enriches a narrative, both revealing and contextualizing, but when justifying one assumes there is a "self" (ego/identity) that needs protection or forgiveness.
The defense of an illusory ego invites reliance on the opinion of others as a guiding principle. Over time "you" cease to be a genuine individual and become a supplicant for their acceptance.
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There is a fine line between self-acceptance and communal spirit.Self-acceptance means keeping your responsibilities separate from others to be genuinely who and what you are. Having confidence in yourself allows you to have confidence in others, prompting community spirit with your comrades.
However, it is easy for self-acceptance to revert to social acceptance. Make sure your community action affirms the "I" rather than giving it away.
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"The mistake was not malicious, just incompetent."
This implies non-malicious intent, which is forgivable.
Yet, inaction to become competent is malicious, because the effects of incompetence and malice are the same.
By perpetuating the correlation that incompetence has no intent (such as a means to avoid responsibility or confrontation) we create a sheltered space for a pity monster to repeatedly harm us while apologizing.
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You can dump yourself into the world, holding nothing back. Even after giving away everything, you will still be here.
Or, you can hold onto your "self" using the strain and pressure to shape a fortified self. And, yet, if that collapses you will still be here.
