Belly Button Lint

Feeling Lint-y?

Tag: relationships

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    Debunking the sanctity of nature

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    1–2 minutes

    Returning to nature (what is natural) means returning to a state of purity before humans intervened. Yet, we often forget that nature is not beneficent, and most of human history is a struggle to stay alive.

    Our romanticizing of nature is an idealistic return to a sanitized version: a version mediated by men.

    We shamingly pronounce “it’s not natural” or “they are playing God,” which reveals a value judgment that original states are preferable, while denying the broader scope and benefit from advancement.

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    Following your passion off the plank

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    1–2 minutes

    Some people can’t help but tell you what you want to hear, feeding your worldview.

    It is not until you have confidently walked out onto the plank that you turn to find they have retreated to their safety.

    You wanted the world to be a certain way, and in your passion (with your supposed allies), you forgot how the world works.

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    Giving yourself Away or Holding yourself tight

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    1–2 minutes

    You can dump yourself into the world, holding nothing back. Even after giving away everything, you will still be here.
    Or, you can hold onto your "self" using the strain and pressure to shape a fortified self. And, yet, if that collapses you will still be here.

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    2 years to wisdom

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    1–2 minutes

    It only takes two years of being hurt and frustrated to come across as suddenly wise and resilient.
    Perhaps wisdom is derived from suffering manifested as empathy. Shared pain opens us to listen and respond with vulnerability. Not that others need to listen, but merely offering an ear and commiseration while people are in despair might draw them out of themself for a moment, and from there perhaps they can find a bit more light.

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    You can’t excuse yourself

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    1–2 minutes

    You can’t excuse yourself from consideration; from parsing the acts of others into opinions.
    We have a responsibility to keep thinking even when we shouldn’t be speaking.

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    Sensible conversation as a “representation”

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    1–2 minutes

    “nowadays one can talk with anyone, and it must be admitted that peoples opinions are exceedingly sensible, yet the conversation leaves one with the impression of having talked to an anonymity…” – Soren Kierkegaard

    There is a slide into abstract sensibility: modernity leads from authentic individuality into a “representation” of an opinionated individual. Kierkegaard was concerned that the effacing of the individual for polite equality (democratic banality) in public life works its way inward to our private relationships.
    ~ Matthew Crawford, “The World Beyond Your Head”

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    The cure for pain

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    1–2 minutes

    When you are the center of the world, every emotional pain is amplified. The pain gets trapped in a loop becoming stronger and more hurtful.

    The cure is to care more about something outside of yourself.

  • Theme:

    Labor + Friends

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    1–2 minutes

    You can work twice as long if you have a friend with you.

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    Trojan horse

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    1–2 minutes

    When is a gift not a gift?

    When it is an obligation, which is really a trap.

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    Empathy wins, and loses

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    1–2 minutes

    One enlightenment tactic is broader and broader empathy: if you are empathetic for a person, I am empathetic for people; if you are empathetic for animals, I am empathetic for rocks as well.
    To win, move from the individual particular, to the abstract universal.
    Going meta is not love: true empathy is staying here in the messy particulars.