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When we have a spare moment, it is a survival imperative to look around and act: to plan or consume, to create.
Thoughtfully progressing from the external inward, we self-assess and label our feelings to more deftly acknowledge and manifest them.
We constantly manufacture and work to maintain a state instead of just being here.
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Vacation’s premise of recouperative rest and respite has become work: we manically “add value” to our expensive “free time”.
We cram novel experiences (and novel foods) into the vacuity we gave to ourselves, attempting to fill it while neglecting to consider that floating in a vacuum, untethered and unencumbered, would be the ultimate novelty.
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There are moments of renewal, where you have returned to a generous version of yourself: the thing that would’ve disrupted you yesterday is a laughable matter today.
The ability to recognize that you are not a consistent self, but an emotionally driven collection of circumstances is vital to maintaining the best version of yourself.
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Individualism is not building-up-towards or revealing-the-self, but destruction of the common, which translates as novel difference.
The seduction of new knowledge is arcane insights, which dissolves social norms for self separation. The knowledge -an alchemical agent for change- need not be new, merely distinct.
(Those who do not destroy the common are conformists, hence not individuals in this sense.)
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No one is forcing you to behave this way. You have chosen it.
Our behavior is goal-oriented but often comes from two instincts:1. To establish a consistent self (this is how I am and will always be.)
2. Protect yourself by signaling (I want you to know there is a cost to engaging with me.)
Example: If I choose to be miserable when you ask me to work, I make it painful for both of us while reinforcing my perceived character as a means to better train you.
Example: If you had a bad day, I would belittle your problems with my lousy life, winning at victimization while simultaneously declaring the strength to bear more than you. So, I’m always re-shaping our relationship to force you to defer to me.
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Please return to something you were once good at and rediscover joy.
The world can taint and warp our desires, turning spontaneous happiness into capitalized products and behaviors. Going back to that one thing from childhood can cut through the enveloping layers of despair, cynicism, and falsity to recover the glow inside.
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Your feeling becomes your emotions, which drive your thinking, which in turn becomes your performance in the world.
You are your actions, and if you don’t want to be who you are, start debating the feelings that drive you.
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There is a difference between knowing life could be better and feeling you have lived better.
Recalling a moment of joy, peace, and contentment so profound it haunts you can vibrantly displace the folly of knowing and redirect our striving.
