to harm stupidity. to destroy the presupposition of common sense. to open up new possibilities. to make change.
Tag: learning
- Theme: Growth
“I – it” or “I – thou” or beyond “I”
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1–2 minutes“I” to “it” is our self-to-object relation, which is the vast majority of how we relate to the world.
“I” to “thou” requires reciprocating relations.
A third way to relate is to move behind the “I” into a universal lacking any exchange because it is all one. - Theme: Self
Triggering
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1–2 minutesAny probing question forcing a reconsideration of self is indeed triggering, but why do we hide, victimize, or lash out when asked to look inside? or respond honestly?
We exhibit a deep defense mechanism: some part of our psyche knows personal insight can destroy us. - Theme: Self
Avoidance shrinks your world
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1–2 minutesThe more we avoid pain (and seek comfort), we narrow our world. When difficulty arises, we repeatedly retreat to prevent confrontation.
In retaliation to being cornered, we often manufacture victimhood or become externally adventurous, avoiding the inner courage to confront ourselves. - Theme: Self
Getting vs. Wanting
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1–2 minutesDon’t ask, "what do I want from this?" Ask, "do I want this?"
The difference is getting what you can versus realizing this is not something you want.We spend too much time extracting what we can, pleased with the getting, but stepping back (by reframing the question) asks if we even want to be in the situation.
- Theme: Growth
Planning beyond reason
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1–2 minutesWorking through an insanely optimistic plan changes how you think.
Keep your small daily habits, continue to aggregate your marginal gains, but occasionally go through intense exercises involving schemes for way too much money, insane destinations, and novel values. It can entirely change your life. - Theme: Growth
We don’t learn from mistakes
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1–2 minutesIf we learned from mistakes, we wouldn’t keep making the same ones repeatedly.
We learn from reflecting on the mistake and making a plan to behave differently. When we fail again, we have gained insight into one more way not to do a thing. - Theme: Self
Following your passion off the plank
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1–2 minutesSome people can’t help but tell you what you want to hear, feeding your worldview.
It is not until you have confidently walked out onto the plank that you turn to find they have retreated to their safety.
You wanted the world to be a certain way, and in your passion (with your supposed allies), you forgot how the world works.
- Theme: Growth
Causes in the past rob you of your present
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1–2 minutesEtiology is the study of a cause, or causation, while teleology is the study of the purpose of a phenomenon.
When we focus too much on etiology we become deterministic: this was caused by that. We are detectives uncovering the cause-effect relationship and we allow ourselves to be determined by the past.
When we focus on teleology we look for “the role” achieved by a phenomenon/behavior to uncover its “goal.” Not what caused it, but what is its purpose. As in, “Why do you insist on letting your past control your present?”
The answer is often because it serves me well to blame the past rather than undertake the hard work of changing in the present.
“People are not driven by past causes, but move toward goals that they themselves set.”
The Courage to be Disliked - Theme: Growth
Giving yourself Away or Holding yourself tight
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1–2 minutesYou can dump yourself into the world, holding nothing back. Even after giving away everything, you will still be here.
Or, you can hold onto your "self" using the strain and pressure to shape a fortified self. And, yet, if that collapses you will still be here.