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Tag: change

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    Beyond Binary Flips: duty and pleasure

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    1–2 minutes

    Considering the “binary flip,” where oppositional stances converge into their antithesis, we must remember this is not always the case.

    The flip (reversal) theory says that persistent engagement with an ‘enemy’ can lead to adopting their traits. However, Zizek offers the example of the voyeur, who steals the secrets of others, and so remains secretive, yet they will never be the original party with the same motivations. Similarly, a prohibitive father or an analyst remains separate from their subjects’ desires: the “father” must not become a sex object.

    Zizek reminds us that the transformation into what we oppose is not inevitable. The crux lies in differentiating “duty’s pleasure” from “pleasure’s duty,” highlighting a pivotal divergence where doing your duty may cause pleasure, but to take pleasure from your duty is to pervert it, extracting reward as pathological motivation.

    from Slavoj Zizek

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    You changed: time displacement

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    1–2 minutes

    One day you will get hurtful news that would have infuriated you a year ago.

    Today, you shrug it off.

    Your old priorities have been displaced over time. You can intentionally speed it up or hold on tightly, but physics will win.

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    Moral Flip: Idealism leads to Evil

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    1–2 minutes

    High moral principles reduce room for compromise. In fact, compromise itself is often seen as suspect.

    Inverse to our lauded praise for "moral steadfastness" its rigidity and idealism lead to evil.

    This happens when the desirable ends provide justification for violent and oppressive means. Or, you want good so much that you become bad.

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    Initial insight is a reversal, but not wisdom

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    1–2 minutes

    “Forgiving others isn’t for them, but a gift to ourselves,” or “your anger at me reveals your anger at yourself,” are shared insights that are a reversal of our initial reaction.

    We take the image, flip it, and reflect it back to reveal a hidden dynamic.
    The flaw is to assume insight is wisdom: we have just created a new image. We must remember that images and mirrors are flattened realities unable to contain the complexity of reality.

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    Might makes right

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    1–2 minutes

    As we know: rhymes aren’t right. (neither is alliteration)

    “Might make right” is an intentional slur against bullies, but proves poignantly enough the fragility of righteousness in the face of reality.

    To make right our reality, do we destroy might?
    If so, have we become mighty bullies swinging our glorious righteousness?

    Have we inverted it: Does weakness make warriors?

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    toxicity as survival

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    1–2 minutes

    We assume people are toxic, yet perhaps the creation of toxicity is the environment: toxicity is a reactive survival mechanism.

    However, not all people are toxic, even though raised and abused in the same system.

    There are alternate survival mechanisms: merging, stoicism, resilience, community, kindness, and adaptation.

    Do not accept the system as an excuse for poison.

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    The new must come slowly

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    1–2 minutes

    We constantly seek novelty, but we hate the new.

    We will claim to want new things, but only if they are slightly new, marginally better, and often with little impact on our lives.

    Anything genuinely new is disruptive. We must rethink our lives and how we deal with the world.

    Thus, even if it is an excellent change, such as Jesus coming to earth or marvelous life-and-labor-saving machines freeing us from work, we will hate those changes because they are too new, require too much identity, and relinquish too much agency.

    Newness must come about slowly.

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    Harboring magnanimity

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    1–2 minutes

    When the storm (trauma) has passed, you can move on: you can forgive -and stay wary of another storm- but remain civil and enjoy the journey.

    After redirecting your course, some will relive the storm repeatedly, unable to get past their role as a witness, perhaps feeling guilty for staying in the harbor while you suffered.

    They will reel you into their harbor of reliving the past: it is a generous myopic safety, perhaps a safe harbor, but more likely it is the next challenge to your growth.

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    Recognition vs responsibility

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    1–2 minutes

    We are always complicit, but owning our part is vital.

    Simplistically, there are two paths: Recognition of complicity and a lack of action, motivation, or change. This assumes you are either okay with the status quo or unmotivated to prioritize change. The other path is to be aware of your part and take responsibility: you act and practice altering your behavior patterns.
    Some paradigms are so significant, such as climate change or wealth aristocracy, that change seems improbable, so we focus on what we can change: ourselves.

    The goal is to become a model of possibility (people can change) and to grow internally secure enough to reverse stability and radiate outward, positively affecting global conditions.

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    Provocation reveals us

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    1–2 minutes

    We push to test if our standing has changed: can we change our fate, prod our stars into an alternate alignment?

    If we push hard enough, will we become something more? Will we escape our own insecurity?

    More complicated: Do we revel in our pain to see ourselves clearly?

    By pushing and receiving pushback or encountering limits that revoke our desires, do we demarcate ourselves through pain or rejection, that is, find the shape of ourselves by encountering our limits painfully? And in retreat, when reassessing, do we lick our wounds engaged in self-pity, finding within the pity a vital core that will try again?

    inspired by Albert Camus