While we find it relatively easy to forgive others, it is more difficult to forgive ourselves.
We feel wounded and blame our internal pain on another, which justifies lashing out. Yet, as Anthony DeMello, Alfred Adler, and Victor Frankl reveal, you have chosen to be hurt and hold onto your pain.
This is why you can forgive them easier than yourself: they did not cause the pain as much as you held onto it and weaponized it.
The focus of your rage is merely a proxy projection for your internal disgruntlement. The trick of forgiving yourself is now doubly tricky because you allowed yourself to treat someone else poorly: to forgive yourself after lashing out is to accept your monstrosity.