“How are you doing?” ~ “Fine.”
Most greetings are symbolic exchanges: a social nicety, a nod to politeness, in no way meant to be answered as a genuine inquiry. They start an interaction and establish a minimum harmony between people.
As an aside, the correct response, “I’m well,” instantly reveals an exhausting pedant, thrilled with a minor win and unaware of the larger loss.
More interestingly, the phrase operates on multiple implexed levels:
- First, for the exchange to move forward, we pretend “fine” with an acknowledgment of the querier’s illusion of care, a pastiche nicety without genuine concern. It is a passcode, sussing out those who cannot react appropriately, which is to say, in the trained way.
- Second, it is somewhat true that we are “fine” if we function in society.
- Finally, we are never “fine” on a darker level because society inherently perturbs comfort and familiarity with the symbolic guise, the artificial interaction as a necessity to functionality.